Trust

Trust defined is the faith or belief that things are going to happen a certain kind of way.  For example, that people are going to be loyal, or stand by their commitments.  In relationships, trust often becomes a defining factor to the success of the pairing. We may trust in things, hold things in trust, trust in each other, etc.  Like faith, trust often refers to the unknown, as with “we trust everything will be okay.” Trust can also be a controlling kind of thing as when we trust each other with truths or behaviors that fit our agenda. For instance, “I’m trusting you not to fail me” or “I’m trusting you to be true, or not lie.”

Often times our rules of love are based on trust.  Many people fall “out of love” when they feel their trust has been betrayed.  (See Love at http://www.wakingupwithpatrick.com).

As presence comes to the forefront of our lives, we begin to see trust differently. We come to the knowledge that trust is a bit of an illusion. The majority of us are entrusted with this wonderful life we have been given. Entrusted with this physical form, body, temple, whatever you want to call it, yet fail ourselves by not doing everything in our power to honor, and take care of ourselves as we should; yet, we make expectations of others when we entrust them with the secrets, our observations, and our hearts.  We want to trust them yet we can’t trust ourselves to take care of us.

The student of meditation comes to the understanding that laying the burden of trust upon another is more about control than anything else. If I tell you I’m going to trust you not to tell this story or that story or entrust you to follow through on a mission or desire of mine, I’m really seeking a bit of control over you.  And watch out if you fail my “trust!”

You may think of trust as a bit of an illusion.  See yourself clearly, see others clearly (not as you think they are) and the need to trust will fade.

We should be able to trust that people will stand by us; do as they say, be loyal, etc.; yet, we really are not seeing the nature of others. If we did we would not be putting such great responsibilities on each other.

We set each other up to fail. If you betray my trust (fail my attempt to control you), I will shun you and separate myself from you.  As we see each other more clearly we find as much as we want to trust, we are all subject to fail the expectations of others.

You can remove many aspects of the need for trust from your life. If you don’t want it repeated, don’t say it.  If you say it, be prepared for it to come back to you. If you want trust in a relationship, go for it, but be prepared in the event of its failure. Take the responsibility off of others to meet your expectations; see them as they are. Move towards the positive, remove yourself from the negative. If another fails your trust, or expectations, learn, grow, decide and move forward if necessary.

A meditation, try it out here or there, when it comes to mind or not. Focus your attention on something as you would during meditation. Consider in the moment your dealings with others, mainly putting expectations on them in areas of trust.  Digest what your mind is telling you; don’t judge the thoughts, just observe. Observe if the words “can I trust” or “I’m trusting you” lead to emotions that resemble control or putting expectations on others that will set them up to fail. Bringing conscious awareness to the thoughts may very well change your desire to continue to play the trust game. Not because you chose to drop this controlling behavior, but rather it fades on its own as presence and understanding come forward in your life.

It’s a new day. Your day.

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wakingupwithpatrick

Inner peace may mean different things to different people. Some may believe that inner peace is different for all of us, which can also make defining inner peace a challenge. For many of us, the desire for inner peace can be clouded by definition or in our inability to possess the knowledge to find such a state of being. For myself, inner peace is a mental state of being not clouded by the repetitive conditioned programmed thinking of my mind. A state of being where my true conscious self is separate from the manipulation of my thought stream. Like too many people, I had a rough start. I was raised in the 1960s during a time where the line between discipline and abuse had not yet been drawn by society and where, in many homes, neglect and victimization was the norm. In too many arenas, it is still the same for many unfortunate children and young people today. As a result of the environment I was raised in, I spent most of my twenties in a state of mental anguish. At the age of 27 I came to the understanding that abusing drugs and alcohol was not the answer for dealing with a tortured mind, and though I was able to accomplish and attain many material things that the world had to offer, I wanted something more, inner peace. After being diagnosed with institutional grade PTSD and several sever forms of depression, I decided to take on the challenge of psychoanalytic therapy. For 13 years, I worked with therapists, psychiatrists, psychoanalysts, and medical doctors to address the disorders that were the result of my upbringing. I included personal studies of psychology and human behavior to add more knowledge in my pursuit of wellness. By the age of 40, as I had always done, I was sharing the knowledge I had gained and my life experience with others with similar situations to my own. Despite my efforts, I could still not separate from the mind of a manic depressive. I could not attain inner peace. My desire for inner peace led me to meditation. Meditation is a practice that separates us from the workings of the conditioned programmed mind and the endless stream of thought. After several months of mediation studies and practice, I began to feel the separation of my true self from the confines and mental torture of my own mind. At that moment a new, although difficult, journey had begun. I spent years of riding the roller-coaster of mental anguish and peace as I continued my struggle to mental freedom. Now, 18 years since my meditation studies commenced, I find myself in a state of conscious presence that allows me to live peacefully with a mind suffering from mental illness. My journey has included sharing my knowledge and understanding of the inner workings of the mind with others to help them attain peace and joy as I have; aiding them in their quest to escape the suffering of the confines of their programmed conditioned minds. I have recently taken my teaching to a new level, carrying myself as a published writer, teaching mediation and sharing the knowledge of the ability for each and every one of us to achieve our natural state of being, which is peace, love and joy.

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